As These Shadows Fall
by PatriciaRoseLovett
Summary: I'm sitting here weeping while the hours pass so slow, and I know that in the mornin' I have to let you go, and you'll just be a man who once I used to know. This isn't all my fault. When will you realize? Lookin' at you leavin' I'm looking for a sign."
1. Chapter 1

"Nicky, I want you out of the apartment when I get there."

"What, you're kicking me out?" He laughed nervously.

"Go live in the park, for all I care!" Rod exploded before running off.

"But wait, Rod I -" No use. He was gone around the corner. Nicky stared after him for a minute, confused, before turning back to the remaining members of the wedding. "I think I'd better go try to, uh, patch things up with Rod. I didn't mean to make him mad on purpose!" And he started after his roommate, even though he knew that it wasn't any use. Rod had made up his mind. But he still had to get back to the apartment. How much time would Rod allow him to get his things packed and get out? How long would it be until Rod asked him back, if he ever did? Nicky wasn't stupid. He'd picked up on the blue man's feelings for him. He just wasn't sure of his own yet. Maybe being homeless would help him work things out, and if he ever got accepted back as Rod's roommate, he'd know how he felt.

_

* * *

Why was I so __**stupid**__?_ Rod thought that night, staring up at the ceiling of the bedroom. _Why did I have to kick him out? And in front of our friends, no less. How could I have been so __**stupid**__?_ He looked over at the digital clock on the night stand - 11:55. He had to go into work the next day. Why couldn't he get to sleep? Nicky. Was he okay? Would he be able to survive with out Rod? Would Rod be able to survive without him? He knew that it would be just another sleepless night because of Nicky.

Rod got out of bed, slipping his feet into slippers, and walked to the kitchen of the apartment. The lack of mess on the counter - the result of having nothing to do on a Sunday afternoon after a wedding - almost made him cry. But the reminder of the green man he used to call roommate would have been too strong otherwise. Maybe now that the clutter wasn't there, he could try to move on, but he had a gut feeling that, no matter how hard he tried, he wouldn't be able to move on from Nicky.

**A/N: Sorry this is short. Just an idea that I to from a song. I'm gonna be writing more of this one (of course), but I just wanted to post this much before I started on chapter two.**


	2. Chapter 2

Nicky sat on the corner of 45th and Broadway, watching people pass by, occasionally getting money when people realized he was homeless. It was because of his good-for-nothing roommate. He asked himself every day what he'd done to deserve being kicked out, but he'd never been able to understand it. All he'd done was say that he thought that Rod was, in fact, a homosexual, and a closeted one at that. He was. Why did Rod have to go and deny it and kick him out? It didn't make sense, especially not to him. Maybe if someone else would explain it …

"Hey, Nicky!" the auburn-haired woman he'd befriended that week said brightly, sitting next to him. "You alright?"

"So you know that Rod kicked me out, right?"

"Yeah," she said, nodding.

"Could you make some sense of that for me? I don't get it."

"Well, I think that he kicked you out because he isn't comfortable with who he is, and he didn't want you to drag him out and make him even more uncomfortable. Rod just needs time, Nicky. He'll take you back."

Nicky nodded, taking a breath. "How much money did you get?"

"A lot more than I expected. Riley and Maria have been a great help with everything. They've even offered us a room at the hotel, free of charge for as long as we need it."

"Really?"

The girl nodded. "And they wanted to take us out to dinner tonight. What do you say?"

"You bet! But what about your guitar?"

"The room in the hotel, remember? I've gotta play every day if we keep free rent after we take it."

Nicky smiled. "And where is this hotel?"

Two weeks later. Rod had let go - even though it was just a little bit - and started to move on with his life. This auburn-haired girl who played the guitar, who was so sweet and treated him like he was just another person she called a good friend. She didn't care about the fact he was … _gay._ She embraced it, in fact. She felt it was just human nature to love, regardless of the gender. It was just another thing that he didn't have to worry about.

"Hey, Rod," she smiled, sitting down next to him on the park bench. "How's your Saturday?"

"Can I tell you something?"

"Of course, Rod."

"You have to promise not to tell anyone. Not even Nicky, if you see him."

"I promise," she said, not letting on that she knew where Nicky was.

"You know Nicky and I are friends, right?"

"Yes, sir. Why?"

He took a breath. "I like him more than that, and I don't know if he knows how I feel. I didn't want to tell him, because I didn't know how he'd take it and I didn't know if he felt the same way, and now I can't because I was stupid and kicked him out and-"

"Rod, stop." She held her face in her hands, taking a minute to herself before continuing. "You have feelings for the man. I understand that, I honestly do. But from what you've been telling me and from what everyone else on the street has been telling me, he's not as clueless as you've been led to believe. If I were you, I would just let it go. If you're still feeling this way for him a year from now, tell him. If you don't, move on. Simple as that."

"You think I haven't done that? I've been asking myself every day for the past two weeks why I kicked him out, why I didn't tell him how I felt when I still had the chance. I've gotten my heart crushed so many times in relation to Nicky, and now that I've got the whole apartment to myself, I don't know what I'm going to do."

She looked down at her hands. Nicky had asked her so many things in relation to his ex-roommate, and she hadn't been able to respond. She didn't know how to. Just like now. What did he expect her to do, tell her everything? Let him put his trust in her to have it broken again? She wasn't the Unnamed God above, although people wanted her to be at times. And she was getting annoyed as Hell with it.

"Are you okay?"

The girl nodded. "I will be."

"Come on," Rod said after a moment, standing and offering his hand. "Let's walk."


End file.
